So I picked #2 up from football camp because Hubby took #3 to the doctor. See.....we figured out a while ago that if #3 continues with his meltdowns, then something must be wrong...either a new tic is about to form, he's sick, he's scared, etc....and today he woke up with a fever. So Hubby took him to the doctor and looks like he has some tonsillitis. Just what we needed....a sick kiddo right before school starts. They get home and #3 has to take his medicine....and "BLAHHHHHHHHH"....all over himself, all over #2's legs (who was asleep) and on our couch. We rushed him to the bathroom to take a bath and told him that he HAD to take his medicine again...cuz we certainly didn't get enough of that in the den...on the couch!
Even though all the things I wanted to get done today didn't happen, all afternoon I got to hold that sweet boy while he slept, snored and twitched throughout his sleep. He really did look precious....didn't he?
And then for dinner, Hubby made the most wonderful meal......
Okay....so today is the day....it's one of the MANY reasons why July just isn't a good month for our family. I do know that one day, one month, one year, I will be able to look forward to July, but I'm just not there yet. Here's one of the reasons why I'm not a fan of this month.....
Two years ago, Hubby went to the doctor. Now I can count on my hand how many times he had been to the doctor in the 18 years that I've known him, so I knew something was wrong. The doctor told him that he thought it was an infection, but would get an ultrasound done just in case....which was two days later. When he got the ultrasound done, the technician send him immediately back to the doctor.....that's pretty much a red flag for "SOMETHING IS WRONG"!!!!
I'll never forgot waiting for him to come home and crying and telling the #s that we will talk when Hubby gets home. I'll never forget the sorrow in their eyes even though they didn't know anything. I'll never forget them asking "did someone die"? I finally told them that they could play with something at the table....and play-doh is what they picked. Hubby walked in...the #'s sitting at the table and Hubby sat down with us and explained that the doctor told him that he had testicular cancer. He would be seeing a specialist and have some scans done the next day. I'll never forget #1 saying "can't that kill you". I'll never forget #2 saying he wasn't going to use the toilet because he didn't want to get it. I'll never forget #3 saying absolutely nothing.
Over the next few days, there were more tests, lots of blood work, doctor appointments, and tons of calls to make. I would sit in the waiting room during his scans and just be in tears. I cried in the shower, cried in my sleep.....and then tears wouldn't fall from my eyes anymore. Hubby had surgery the Monday after the Wednesday he found out he had cancer. He was told it was a fast growing cancer and had to be out immediately.....and it's so fast that he didn't have any signs one day and the next day, he knew something was wrong. Fast. Growing. Cancer.
When did that word sneak into our lives? Oh, it didn't....it came in barreling like a train on full speed ahead. We didn't expect it. We didn't invite it in. He doesn't have cancer in his family. Guess what I found out....cancer doesn't discriminate. Cancer doesn't care what color you are. Cancer doesn't care how old you are. Cancer doesn't care where you went to school or how much school you have. Cancer doesn't care how much money you make. Cancer doesn't care if you have a family. Cancer doesn't care if your kids are scared. Cancer doesn't care. But I will tell you this....I hate cancer.
I hate the way cancer sounds. I hate the way cancer just walks in and tears a life apart. I hate the way cancer spreads to ask more questions about past and future in your family line. I hate the way cancer made my Hubby feel. I hate the way cancer made my #s feel. I hate cancer.
Hubby had surgery and it was a success! Hubby had radiation and it was a success! We dealt with the insurance company and, eventually, it was a success. The #s were absolutely wonderful during all of this...they prayed, they cried, they laughed....and they knew that their Daddy was going to be okay....though it still took a while for #2 to use the same toilet seat as Hubby.
So.....I'm not a fan of July. Today marks the two year mark of finding out Hubby had cancer. We get to say "had".....cuz we are praying that next week's CT scan shows nothing! Absolutely nothing....all clear....no spots...nothing! So I leave with this picture....cuz I truly feel that our family had to use our superhero powers (God, love, trust, prayer, family, friends, etc.) to get through cancer....and everything else that I can't stand in July......
Will be thinking about you all. Hope #3 feels better soon and you get your room done! Summer went by fast!
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