Politics....Enter At Your Own Risk

A few nights ago....

#3:  I had the worst dream ever!  

Me:  What was it about?

#3:  Donald Trump wasn't president....but because he's so powerful, he made all of us his slaves.  

Apparently, it's time to turn off CNN and stop watching the primaries.  This is something that we've done every Tuesday for the last few weeks....seeing who wins which states...trying to figure out these uncommitted delegates...going over the pros and cons of each candidate (though the list of cons is much longer and much easier to find on BOTH sides)....and just trying to understand what's going on in our country, their minds, our hearts, and what in the world is going to happen later on in the year.  

My kiddos have been talking about politics for a while.  I'll be honest, I grew up on a one-sided political line and have always thought you had to vote party lines no matter what.  Meeting my fabulous Hubby....I saw the other side of politics....and what I learned?  Well, both sides stink.  I'm talking a stink like garbage.  I love the fact that my #s are interested, but I find it funny how little they know about a candidate and what they do know, they hear from their friends....who are hearing bits and pieces from their parents.

For example, #1 has talked negatively about Donald Trump for the last few months, but he can't really tell me why he's talking negatively about him.  He "boos" every time he comes on TV and says how anybody else will do better.  And when I question him on it or ask what the other candidates will do that Trump can't, he can't tell me really why he doesn't want him to be president, he just doesn't.  

#2 really wants to know if one of them will make recess mandatory and longer and make everybody play sports....I can't say that any of the candidates are like that, but I'm pretty sure that if he sees one of the candidates playing ball, he'd vote for that one.  

#3 is afraid of Trump....and doesn't know the other ones....but he still thinks that if Trump wins, he'll be a slave to him and have to serve him food.  I mean, I'm thinking that I bet he'd have a gorgeous house to live in!  :-)

I remember when I was a little girl, I stayed up WAY too late and I had to color a map of the United States as the numbers came in to decide who would be president.  I don't remember talking about political lines, political agendas, nothing....I just remember coloring in the states.  I also remember growing up and hearing one side of politics and really not understanding anything.  I mean, I was a free-spirited, OCD type of girl who liked a schedule and didn't really care about anything that didn't affect me like politics, right????  ha ha!

As I hear all of these candidates speak out of both sides of their mouth so eloquently, I am frustrated that I can't really show the #s what each candidate will do for the future of United States of America. I can, however, show them how to tear someone down, how to team up with another candidate to block another, how to show hate, how to beat around the bush when it comes to answering questions, how to say one thing and do another, how to cuss, how to place blame, how to hurt others, how to lie, how to deceive, how to win, how not to win, how to lose, how not to lose, how to see which news station is cheering for, how to roll their eyes, how to be sarcastic, and how to answer a question with another question.  Honestly, it's probably an education that will do them good later in life.  

Now, before you say "oh she's voting for so and so" or "I know who she likes"....you don't....cuz I don't.  I want to make a great, informed decision based on knowledge....based on the research that I've done...not someone else's research....not someone else's opinion.  I had a great conversation with my dad the other day about how I have got to look at everything when voting for our future president....but I know that whoever is president, I still have a God that takes care of me, loves me, and, actually, already knows who will be president and what path America will be going towards.  

So after the #s were bathed and ready for bed, we did our Bible study and it was actually titled "World of Wars".  The lesson talked about politics and how it doesn't matter who is president, governor, etc....we're still going to have wars and not have total peace, but how wonderful we have it as Christians as we get to look forward to Heaven.  It was nice to be able to tell the #s that we have peace in God and not to worry about these political things....YES, we need to vote, YES we need to be informed, but whatever happens, God has blessed and will continue to take care of Our Life By Numbers!  

Things I Never Thought I Would Say...Until Motherhood....

*Do not pee on your brother.

*We do not believe in the Old Testament "eye for an eye".

*You cannot swim underwater in the bathtub.

*When I say "make up your bed" I mean for you to get out of it.

*Just because everything you have on is red, that does not mean that it matches.

*I am really wanting a little bit of privacy while I use the bathroom.

*You do not need to shave your legs.

*I know you didn't turn on the lights....but that doesn't mean you can't turn them off.

*I am not your maid.

*Why are there socks in the cupholders?

*You smell worse than the garbage.

*Deodorant is your friend.

*Zombies aren't real.  Donald Trump is real.  Donald Trump is not going to make you a slave.  Go back to sleep.

*The world does not revolve around you.

*Suck it up buttercup.

*If I hear a ball bounce in this house one more time....

*Bread IS a food group, but it's not the ONLY food group.

*If you don't like the food, do not spit it back in the bowl.

*Curtains do not go on the floor....stop hitting the ball with it.

*Your face is part of your body....you have to wash that too.

*That's why we don't have any nice things in this house.

*I will win this battle.

*You may not wear just underwear and a cape to school as the book character Captain Underpants.

*Do not eat off the floor.

*Yes, I AM the meanest mommy in the world...I get a trophy later.

*I'm pretty sure that's not appropriate.

*Do not lick your brother.

*Hide if you'd like, but make sure I know where you are.

*Thank you for painting my toenails.

*The mat should not be used to slide down the stairs.

*We have zero trees that grow money in our backyard.

*That would be called dust.

*I don't like to do laundry either.....so I'll just start doing my laundry and you can do your own.  Hope you have underwear in a few days.

*You were not raised in a barn....close the door.

*Girls can do all things guys can do....except pee standing up.

*You got your moves from your dad....that means stop dancing.

*Are you aware that I am the parent and you are the child?

*I am not coming to look at what you've done in the bathroom.

*Yes....I have my own soap and my own shampoo...so will your wife...I'm teaching you now.

*Stop listening to your friends....they know nothing and make stuff up.

*If you ever change a password on this device, you will never see an electronic device for the rest of your life.

*Pick a costume to wear so we can go to the store.

*I am not peeling that dead mouse off the baseboard....we'll leave it for Daddy.

*My car looks like the playroom.

*There are some things adults just get....a frosted lemonade from Chick-Fil-A is one of those.

*How do you lose a shoe?

*Your clothes are on backwards....and inside out.

*There WAS color tv when I was little.

*This is where the tv remote lives....right here....not in your hand, not in your room, not in the bathroom.

*You don't need the remote to poop.

*Do not ever jump from the loft onto the couch.

*We do not swing our brother from the top bunk bed with a sheet for him to hold on to....don't do it again.

*I love you so much....now get to bed.

*It is not a competition to see who can argue the most.

*Do you have to start an argument?  I mean, is it worth it to start them fighting AND get in trouble?

*You are just like your mother...and today, that's not a compliment!

*We are running late....is there a reason that you are still in your towel?

*I am quite certain your teacher didn't send this homework for me to do.

*You received a compliment from your teacher today....I'm thinking about having her come over to see how you really act.

*Stop farting in my bed.

*You do realize there are multiple toilets in this house, right?

*Why is your volume from your mouth so loud?

*Grunting is not communication.

*We do not chant to get our way.

*Seriously....cut your toenails.

*You give God your best....and then me....you better give me a million times your best more than your teacher.

....and last but not least....

*Why and how did you come home from a birthday party without your shirt?  You're 8 years old and I'm not ready for your "frat party" life yet.

Welcome to our life by numbers!

Welcome to My SoapBox

I'm about to step on my soapbox people...cuz I am done...D-O-N-E with this time of year.  It's supposed to be a great time....a time where teachers and students are counting down the days, end of the year field trips are being planned, the last week of school is being looked at as a total fun week, and we clean out desks and lockers and get ready for a ton of fun in the sun!  This is a time where we put it together....the kiddos see how much they've grown.  They do projects.  They enjoy the outdoors.  Even though they are looking forward to summer break, they still love school.

But no....this is now the time of year where testing comes into play.  FIVE DAYS OF TESTING!!!!  Teachers stand in front of the class and read the directions in a monotonous tone as to not give any help to the children how the test should go.  Kiddos sit at their desks for a few hours with their pencils and they fill in bubbles or answer questions that they have to have a perfect paragraph for (yes...I just ended that sentence in a preposition).  Days where teachers walk around the room for a few hours and watch their kiddos take the test.  They're not allowed to help.  They're not allowed to answer questions.  They're not allowed to walk to a child that is struggling and say "you got it correct....keep going"!  They are having to be like drill sergeants watching the children and their every move.  They walk....and wait...and walk...and wait.  TIME!  And the kiddos close their booklets with a sigh of relieve.

Last year, I walked down the hallway and kiddos were crying...literally crying about these tests.  Tests that mean nothing to them.  Scores that come in the next school year when the children have already forgotten about this horrible time of year.  Teachers are crazy with anxiety because they wonder what will it mean for them....what will the district say? what will my principal say?  what do these test say about me?

And don't get me wrong...I know there's a need for accountability.  Teachers need to know where their students are....but have we come so far off he grid that we don't trust that our teachers can assess the kiddos?  Do we think that a group of people that make a booklet are more specialized than the ones actually teaching our children?  Do the people know more about my child than my child's teachers?  Do they know that one of my kiddos has so much anxiety during a test that he'll make himself sick?  Do they know that one of my kiddos might zip through a test just to end it faster so he can take a break from reading?  Do they know that one of my kiddos has to take breaks or the frustration will send him over the top?  NO!  Just his teachers know that...you know, the people that see him EVERY DAY.

I have two kiddos taking tests this year.  One in 7th grade and one in 3rd.  How in the world have I prepared my 3rd grader that last year was a time of learning and fun and this year is a world of learning and he better be getting it right on a test?!??!?!  I haven't.  I've told them that these tests are where he needs to do his best, but he doesn't need to fret over these.  This test means nothing.  This test is just for him to do his best.  He's still going to go on to the 4th grade even if he does poorly.  He's still going to be able to play sports.  He's still going to be loved by his family.  You know why I say this?  Cuz I think this testing sucks.  I mean, let's get real.  During the week of testing, we're told to make sure our child gets a good night rest and eats a healthy breakfast....if I'm a parent, then shouldn't I know that by now?  This is the time of year where my kiddos are so stressed and mornings are much harder on us because they're worried about sitting in a chair for hours.  My 9 year old needs recess...in fact, this kid of mine actually needs nap time because he goes so hard....he doesn't need to sit for an hour...or two...or three and take a test.

And my 7th grader?  Well he's already concerned about these tests because he feels that if he doesn't do his best, he'll disappoint his teachers. I KNOW the teachers he has....I KNOW they haven't told him that.  I KNOW that they love him.  I KNOW that they would not guilt my kiddo into doing his best.  But that's what testing has done to our children.  Made them workaholics...this is like their end of the year review....this kind of stress shouldn't happen with adults....and it SURELY shouldn't happen with our children.  We're making our kiddos little testing machines.  I want them to be creative human beings...let them spread their wings and fly a little....not staple wings to their backs and hold them while they go nowhere.

Testing comes in 2 1/2 weeks.  My #s are already asking about making sure we get to school on time and making sure they eat more than pop tarts or cereal....they want a hot breakfast.  Let me tell ya....we don't do that now and they're fine so I'm not going to mess with their mojo and give them something hot.  :-)  I love each and every teacher that my kiddos have.  I love that they put their heart and soul into my children.  I love how they teach them, how they love them, how they care about them.  I love that they are all committed teachers that teach for a purpose....to expand the minds of my children.  I pray that one day you can actually go back to teaching....teaching for the real reason you got into education...and not for a test!

and goes back to our life by numbers!

Took A Trip Down Memory Lane

Think about your childhood....what comes to mind?  Food you ate?  Games you played?  Places you visited?  Do certain smells or pictures trigger a flood of memories?  Do you remember certain TV shows or songs and it takes you back to "the good old days"?  This week was our family's spring break....and since there was no surprising them to any vacation resort, I made an executive decision to  take a trip down memory lane....
Me:  This spring break we are taking a trip!
#s:  YAHOOOOO!!!!!!  You're surprising us again with a trip!
Me:  Not just any trip....a trip down memory lane!
#1:  That doesn't sound like fun.
#2:  No, it doesn't.
#3:  Do we get to buy a stuffed animal?  Is it that kind of lane trip?
Me:  We are going to do things that I did as a kid.
#s:  OH NO!!!!!!!
....and sadly, they've been dreading this trip for the last two weeks.  In fact, spring break didn't look so good to them since I told them about my idea.  But the time came for the '70s, '80s, '90s spring break memory lane trip and I was so excited!

Sunday...
We started off just like I would have as a little girl.  We went to church (yes, we do that every Sunday anyway) and then stayed until the last people left.  We then went out to eat with some friends.  When I was little, we would always go to Quincy's (those big, fat yeast rolls).....but since I don't like buffets and that restaurant isn't even around, we opted to eat Mexican food.  We would have never done that when I was little.  It was Quincy's, KFC, and the occasional Luby's Cafeteria....so this was much better.  :)

Monday...was rockin'.....we cleaned.  Yes, I grew up in a household that cleaned.  We usually did that on Saturdays, but Monday was just fine.  I'm sure the #s were very excited that they got to do a household chore that I had to do growing up.  Spreadin' the love!

We did go outside.....electronic free for four hours.  Sad thing...I got zero pictures or I would have had my electronic.  We played games on the trampoline and had a blast.  We laughed so much while we made up games and just had fun.  Around hour three, we were a little tired, so we laid down on the trampoline and looked at the clouds.  Then we did what I used to do (and sometimes still do)....we made pictures and stories out of the clouds that were passing over us.  We had fun making up stories and finding dragons and dogs out of the clouds.....
#2:  When you were little, where did you lay down?
Me:  On the deck....on on the slide.
#3:  You didn't have a trampoline?
Me:  No.
#1:  Hummmm.....
.....and when we went back inside, we ate dinner with Hubby as a family.  Just a fun time getting the kids outside and having fun without a care in the world.

On Tuesday, we got up and got ready and headed to the mall.  I spent many a times at Cool Springs Galleria walking the mall with my friends.  This is what #1 wanted to do for his birthday so it worked out quite nicely for my "memory lane spring break".  We ended up going to Opry Mills and it was so nice to see the #s look at stuff, pick up things and put them back, check prices, realize that things are overpriced...and make a stuffed animal.  No, we wouldn't have done that as a kid, but #3 did ask about getting a stuffed animal.  We met my parents there to celebrate #1's birthday....which lead to eating out....which lead to a political conversation.  I mean, seriously folks, it's like I was in 9th grade again.  :)

Wednesday we too the #s to the movies.  I would meet my friends there at times.  We explained to the #s that prices never used to be this high and how ridiculous it was to really go see a movie anymore since they come out so quickly on DVD or iTunes.  Apparently a lot of my childhood was complaining about the price of things.  We did go to store and let them pick out a TV dinner....
#1:  So we just pick out what we want and we take it home?
Me:  Yes....after you pay for it.
#3:  And we put it in the microwave?
Me:  Yes.
#2:  And we eat in front of the tv?
Me:  Hence the name "TV Dinner".  

To start off our day on Thursday, I introduced the #s to a cereal called "Cracklin' Oat Bran".  Seriously folks, I've been eating this cereal since 4th grade....so....I can say I've been "regular" since 4th grade.  And you know what....they loved it.  WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?  I remember Mom and Dad going to get ready and we would sneak the sugar container out of the cabinet and pour sugar all over our cereal just to be able to swallow it.  I remember scraping the sugar from the bottom of the bowl and having that little bit of milk to be able to swallow it and not choke.  And what happens when I introduce this piece of yuckiness to my #s?  They end of loving it.  Of course they do.

We ended up having soccer practice which was fabulous!  We talked about how commitment to a team is being there for each other....not like I had to talk #2 into going to practice.  As he practiced, I walked a few miles.  This is something that I would do every day when I was little. I would walk around our neighborhood and say hi to friends and make sure I was home by dinner.  #1 and #3 played on the playground which was also what we would do at friend's homes.  We had another great time being outdoors and electronic free.  Don't get me wrong, I like having my electronics around, but sometimes it's good to just get away!

My favorite part was showing them what a TV dinner was.  You would have thought I was introducing them to something that had just been invented.  They were amazed that in one meal came pizza, corn and a brownie for #3 and corn dogs, fries, corn, and a brownie for #1 and #2.  They couldn't get over how short of a time it took to cook the meal.  And when I put their meal on the table in the den and turned on the TV, you would have thought they won the lottery.  And you know what shows I introduced them to?  Mama's Family and Family Matters.  They loved it.  We also had homemade chocolate chip cookies and milk....and they dunked their cookies in their milk and watched the cookies crumble in the milk....it was a night that I absolutely loved.  I had my all time TV dinner....Banquet Chicken Pot Pie.  I'm pretty sure I'm still drinking water to get rid of the salt intake, but it sure did bring back memories.

On Friday we did nothing.  I mean, nothing.  I'm pretty sure the #s were in their pajamas all day and nobody cared.  We didn't get a lot of those days growing up, but when we did, they were absolutely wonderful and we took full advantage of them....just like we did on Friday!

Saturday was a time of cleaning up.  The #s played outside while I worked on some boxes in the garage and Hubby started working on the front porch.  It was nice to hear the #s laughing outside as they played ball and jumped on the trampoline.

So today is our last day of spring break.  We started our day with our friends at church and then on the way home, we looked at houses that were for sale.  Funny....we did that a lot on Sunday afternoons when we were growing up.  We came home and ate pizza and introduced them to Gilligan's Island...another childhood favorite...and they couldn't believe it was in black and white!  Now we are getting last minute stuff ready for school this week....just like we did on Sunday afternoons growing up....

As the #s and I discussed this week of walking down memory lane, I realized that there are a lot of things that I want for my #s that I didn't get while growing up, but I also didn't have such a bad childhood.  I joke about only eating TV dinners, scrambled eggs and oatmeal, but I did love all those things and oatmeal takes me back to my childhood the second I start eating it.  I look back and see how hard mom and dad worked so I would get the things I needed and wanted....so I could do the things I wanted to do.  I see that I want to give them things that they want, but I want them to know that "things" aren't near as important as family.  I want them to remember the good times and not the times of anxiety and frustration.  But the best was when the #s started letting me what they thought about this week....
#3:  I like it.....I even liked the tv shows....even the one that was not in color.
#2:  I think we should have TV dinners more often...they are good.
#1:  You know....it wasn't so bad when you were a kid...I could do this spring break again.
....and friends, THAT is what you call a success in our life by numbers!

Happy Birthday #1!

This kid means the world to me!  Our firstborn....the one that we prayed for....for years!  He is a brilliant kid who loves to be funny, loves music, doesn't know how to make a bed correctly, loves to meet new friends, wants to come up with a latex alternative to everything, and is the biggest goofball ever.  I cannot imagine our family without him!

So today has been an odd day...it's the first birthday that we haven't had a party.  When did boys just decide that parties aren't "hip" anymore?  Last year he wanted one, but he said that none of his friends were having parties...so he wanted one more.  I think he was holding on to the last little bit that he could.  This year....he gave up on the party and decided that he wants to go shopping.

SHOPPING!?!??!?!  If you know Hubby or myself, we don't really shop.  I can't tell you the last time I shopped for clothes...unless I needed something specific.  #1 decided that he wants to go to Opry Mills and go shopping and eat at the Aquarium restaurant.  I'm not ready for this growing up stuff.

For the last month we've asked what he wants for his birthday....
#1:  I don't know.....I have everything I need.  I mean, Christmas was just a little while ago.
Me:  We need to know something.  What do you want to shop for at the mall?
#1:  Money.
Me:  You want to shop for money?!?!?!??!
#1:  No....I just want money for my birthday and I'll get whatever I want.
....and that's the end.  Is this where they grow up and I cry tears of sadness because they aren't babies anymore and tears of joy because it's the easiest birthday we've had since we've had #s?!?!?!

So we gave him money for shopping....

....yes, this was his reaction to cold hard cash to spend...well....cold hard "I'll swipe my card, but I'm keeping a tally with how much your spending" present.  I LOVE that we caught that facial expression!  And I'm really glad that he liked it!

Wanna know the thing that got me more than anything?!!?!?!  I gave him the username and password to his Facebook account.  I'm scared cuz a whole new world could open up for him.  I'm not stupid....I know that kiddos his age already have had accounts in Instagram, Facebook, twitter, etc. for a while now.  But to be able to give him the account just makes me know that he actually is growing up and I just need to get with the program.  Maybe I'm more upset that he'll be able to see everything I post now.....you know, maybe giving him an account isn't such a good idea after all.  :-)

So when we gave him his account...

.....and the weird thing is that he was more excited about that than the money!  :)  And let me tell ya, I've gone over more rules about his account than I ever thought I would....

"Don't click things like this"

"Don't like things like that"

"Some people are serious on Facebook...you can't put a 'ha ha' face on their post"

"I wear underwear is not an appropriate post...it's appropriate to do...but not to post"

"Yes, people post picture of their food....you don't have to make a comment"

"Stop waiting to see if people will approve your request to be friends"

"Don't write anything on Facebook or in a message that you want to be kept a secret"

"People post stupid stuff...you don't have to comment...just move on"

....maybe I should just post all these rules on Facebook?!?!?!  :)  So for the last 45 minutes, I've watched over his shoulder as I witnessed my little boy growing up....

#1 wanted to go to Red Lobster this year....where he ate snow crab legs for the first time.  He wasn't a fan, but he had fun learning how to eat them from Pa....

 ....but the blessing for me was that #1 still wanted a cake this year.  He asked for a shark.  He specifically asked for a shark head coming out of the water with his mouth open about to attack something (where do they get these ideas)....

...I did the best I could, but I loved his face in this picture.  I love the fact that he still wanted a cake.  Did he want it for me?  Probably....but I wouldn't trade that for the world.  There are little things in life that makes my #s seem so grown up to me.  And I know that once the time comes when they don't want a birthday cake, it will be the straw that send me over the edge.....cuz I like doing that just for them....no matter how crazy their ideas might be!

And last, but not least, we did the measurements yesterday and #1 had grown so much that he's officially taller than me.  What happened to the Lord coming before I had a teenager?  I'm pretty sure I've been saying, for years, that was going to happen.  But I am happy that I could spend today with my family and celebrate #1's birthday.  I love that kiddo.  I love his smile, his creativity, and his love for God.  Thank you Lord for blessing me with #1 in our life by numbers!